Mellow morning thus far…
At 2:30am I woke up, couldn't return to sleep, so got up and putzed around the cold apt. Tried stretching – my back ached from the futon at Rocco's the night before. Sat up in bed reading the intro material for “Morphology of Folks Tales” – guaranteed to put one to sleep in 10 minutes or less. Instead, I found myself playing idly with myself while reading; eventually, I put down the book and took greater interest in my dick. My dick certainly took more interest in me than the book did. Fell off to sleep shortly, awoke at 6:00 before the alarm.
Four health/medical appts today:
8:36 Radiation treatment (#4)
9:45 Chiropractor
11:00 Massage
12:45 New PCP – Dr Cavanugh
[sigh] I'll have no time this morning to do anything else. I try to avoid resentment toward my cancer or my body for taking so much time to take care of, but sometimes I can't avoid feeling already weary of the demands my body makes. But, as Gurumayi's 2003 message says, TRUST is tolerant. Having the long view is most important, and I have a great capacity for that.
I'm looking forward to seeing if Dr Chuck, my radiation oncologist doc, has read any part of BEARS ON BEARS yet. And asking what in the world possessed an apparently straight guy to buy my book, other than being a really nice thing to do for a patient.
